wandering through my head...

It's so very tempting to fall into the destruction of depth birthed in the one line lives that we now lead, but that doesn't cleanse. That doesn't get anything of value out of me, the lines sitting there like snippets of a conversation that you don't want to have, a place that you don't want to go (the you includes me) out of laziness & perhaps fear...

I promised myself something in the last few days, and I intend to keep that promise - after all, when I finally do get back to the road, my true home, I should probably have rehearsed the writing again, and brought it back.

One line doesn't fix anything...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I sent a "Happy Mom's Day" email, not expecting a reply, not getting one. And so it goes - even my adopted mom turned her back - but isn;t there something in the contract that they signed to get me saying that she shouldn't do that? That somehow it was against the law, her suffocating religion? Somewhere? I play lightly while this cuts deep...
Something I don;t understand - when I was addicted to all the drugs, when there was nothing I wanted more than growth or death (death was winning, then) the folks were there...

but now with direction, now that the dreams are becoming reality, now that I want to show them that I'm doing something good...
it's a good thing that I have my friends, although I should think that by now even they are growing weary.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I found out that The Burn was on my birthday this year. It would be nice to be there for that, and perhaps write about the happenings oin the Red nose District for a special issue...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

More, but not now. So much more...